embrace the camera:: getting over it

Thursday, December 2, 2010

I'm getting over myself, if only momentarily, and embracing the camera today.
As moms or as photographers, or both, most of us just aren't in a whole lot of pictures, right?
I know I 'm not. and i must say; it's not just that I'm the photographer and/or the mom, 
I also hate to be in pictures. I know that sounds bad and i won't even
 get into the many reasons why, but it's true. 
I'd much rather be behind the camera.
But I also want to be in pictures for my kids someday. Don't we all?
After I took these pictures of Charlotte and I this morning I looked at them and
 my immediate reaction was; "ugh...this one is no good... my face." 
and she said:
 "Your face looks the same every day, I think it's pretty."

So here's the thing:
I may hate my nose. my teeth. the breakouts that I thought would be a distant memory by this age. 
and that's just from the neck on up, I won't even get started on the rest.
But she doesn't.
And he doesn't.
And their kids won't either.

What if my mom refused to ever have her picture taken? My dad?
And what about my grandma whom I just happen to think was one of the most beautiful women ever? 
I doubt she thought she was. 
And I only say that because as women I know how hard we all are on ourselves.
 But what if we had no pictures of her  because she wasn't happy with the way she looked
 that day/month/particular time in her life?
Heavier in some, smaller in the next, pregnant in many... I'm just sayin', she had 15 kids.

 But when I see pictures of her I see her pretty blue eyes, her dark hair and perfect skin
 and that beautiful smile. The other things change and fade but she always had that beautiful smile. 
And when I see that smile it makes me smile and remember.

So I'm going to force myself to do this. Weekly. Or a little more often anyway. 
Because one day I want my kids and my grand kids to look at family pictures, with me actually in them.
I also want them to be able to hold real pictures in their hands, turn them over,
 look for the date, a name or a place. To talk about the family resemblance,
 how young we looked and yes, to laugh at our hairstyles and clothes, too.

I think you should do it, too.

{keeping it real: i totally airbrushed my face a little here, i'm not gonna lie.


  1. oh...this post is so good.

    i definitely struggle with this...
    i delete almost every photo i'm in.

    isn't that terrible?!

    i'm gonna work on that.

    pinky promise.

  2. you're so right!
    the only thing our kids care about is us.
    i'm trying really hard to be in more photos even though i do not love to. but for them i will.

    p.s. charlotte is your mini me!! so cute!

  3. Okay, so randomly it reminds me of The Next Three Days--taking pictures with the children, etc.
    That was weird of me.
    I love the old pictures from Gram's immediate family--sisters, brothers, parents...she's the only one left, but there's always pictures.
    It's comforting.
    You can see a sliver of that person themselves in different shots of them.

  4. Very, very good post! I always make it a point to be in the pics and have lots of them so my girls will have them someday. My Mom hates pictures, and I don't have many of her at all and I hate it. Because, not only do I not have pics of my Mom, the girls won't have lot of pics of their Grandma. Anyway, great post and for the record, you look great!

  5. Very good point! I think I will make that a goal of mine. Thanks for the inspiration! p.s. love the pictures...so fun! My daughter and I just shot some photos like that after we found the camera on the netbook. :)

  6. You are gorgeous. Just sayin' :)
    I completely agree with all that you said in this post. I wish my mom were in more of our family pictures, and I know that's something she regrets as well.

  7. This is so very true, Amy! And I am so glad you were able to embrace the camera today! It is so important...I love looking at pictures of my mom when I was younger! Our kids deserve that. You are beautiful, Amy!

  8. i always love when you are in your pictues, on the blog. i think you are seriously cute. i also support air brushing. or whatever you need to do to get up the courage to post um.
    your daughter looks just like you, and she is pretty cute...i bet you agree, so what does that say about you?? yup.

  9. I love this post. :) I think you are a beautiful woman! :) Don't hide that pretty face! I know my sister is like that - she NEVER wants her picture taken, and she hasn't had children yet, but her family members down the road will never have pics of her, because she never lets anyone put her in a photo. Ever. Props to you for posting pics! Good job! ;) And I love the old photo! I think everyone back then looked so...'graceful'. beautiful!

  10. Sunday night when we were decorating the tree, Drew started taking pictures of me and I actually told him to stop. . .I am not proud of this. . at. . .all! I need to let him take pictures of me if he wants to and deal with my insecurities on my own! Thanks for the reminder!

  11. What a sweet thing for Charlotte to say to you! We are all definitely our own worst critic, and I am exactly the same way, I love taking pictures of everyone else, but don't like to be in pictures myself and do not like when people take candid photos of myself. But I love looking back on photos of my mom through her life, someday when I have kids they will want to do the same. Did you see the post about this on shuttersisters?
    P.S. the photos are adorable.

  12. I LOVE LOVE this post.. the first thought that came as I scrolled through the pictures, before reading, was, "Her daughter will someday look at these pictures and probably cry" (love tears :) because i know, if those were pictures of my mom and I? I would cry happy tears :)

  13. first of all, what a sweet comment from your daughter...and it proves the very point of "who cares what we look like in these pictures...our kids love us just the same"...
    she loves you and thinks you're beautiful (and you are!).

    secondly, i just love everything that you wrote :)

    so glad you joined us this week---keep it up!

  14. I so do the same... i even delete pictures of special moments because I think I look old, or fat, or spotty... I deleted a picture of my mum, my girls and I on the beach on my daughters birthday because I looked older than I'd like... now I regret it like crazy and wish I could bring the moment back... how stupid and vain do I feel... I'll think of this post next time I'm on the fence! Take care. Lx
    P.s You look great and your daughter is picture perfect!

  15. GUILTY! I do the same darn thing. I refuse to hand over my camera mainly so I can avoid being in photos. I cringe when other's take my photo because I know they won't even do me the couresy of "touching up" before posting :D It sounds so vain - but it is TRUE. I vow to *try* to do better, because you are right. I love looking back at photos of my mom and grandma too. :D
    PS - I love the photos of you and your girl. You are both beautiful and the flower head bands are DARLING :D

  16. i think you look absolutely beautiful.

  17. Yep. I'm behind the camera waaaay more than I'm in front of it. I've learned to ask. I tell Evan to take pictures of me and the girls more than I used to. And, yeah, I'm not totally happy with me, but everyone tells her she looks like just like me and she beams. I need to remember that when I am shying away from the camera.

  18. Such a well-made point, Amy. I'm going to step out in front of the camera this weekend, inspired by you! J x

  19. Love love this post! So good and so true!! I often have to remind myself to give the camera to my husband every now and then so I can be in photos too....I don't know what I would do without pictures of my mom who has since passed...and I don't want my boys to feel the same way.

  20. The exact same thing happens at my house too. More because I'm afraid to let my husband use the camera. I need to get over myself and accept that autopsy will just have to do.

  21. Your daughter is beautiful and from what I can tell in these pictures, she looks just like her mom, and I bet she wants to keep looking like you when she grows up!

  22. I'm in such an emotional place right now and this post made me cry. I am the same way. I delete almost every pic of myself. It KILLED me to post that pic of the 4 of us in bed b/c I looked bad, but all 3 of my peeps looked so good I had to. I'm trying really hard to be in more pix. Especially when I think about the fact that I want them to have them when I'm gone.

    And you know what? I find when I look back on pix of myself that I didn't love a few months later, I think, "I didn't look so bad there after all."

    I'll join you in your new resolution. The New Year is right around the corner.

    PS..You have nothing to worry about anyway. You are absolutely adorable and so is Miss Charlotte.

  23. Great post, Amy. I totally agree. I am not in many pics...and I feel weird asking someone to take my picture.

    I take a lot of self portraits with my phone. Usually for profile pics. The are easy to erase as well. But that just proves your point, huh?

    Nothing...nothing beats old photographs.

  24. I think you're beautiful. And I love having a face to put with your beautiful internet voice. :)

    (Oh, and can I just say, I'm breaking out like I'm sixteen again. What the HECK. I feel your pain.)

  25. Great post...it rings loud and true. Those images will mean the world to your kids one day...so glad you joined Embrace the Camera this week. :)

  26. I agree with your daughter. I think you're pretty! But, I totally get it. There are almost no photographs of me pre-kiddos. I was way to embarrassed. But once I had Levi, I realized that I didn't want him to have tons of photos of just himself. I wanted him to be able to look back and remember us together. So, I plunged in and stuck my face in front of the camera. Post-Sophia, I'm 25 stubborn pounds heavier than I once was, but I still make myself get in there and smile. I think someday my kids will be glad I did.


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