I had a moment the other day.
It was one of those strange moments where you can almost see yourself, sitting there doing what
you are doing, but from the outside.
you are doing, but from the outside.
I was sitting at the kitchen table listening to music on my little wireless speaker that plays music from my phone.
I was trying to sew patches on Charlotte's Brownie vest about thirty minutes before her Girl Scout meeting started. I was doing a pretty bad job of it, too.
It's something I put off over and over- I do a pretty crappy job, I can never find needles, or the badges and mostly because I just know after I go through all the trouble to finally sew them on I will find
out that I sewed them on in the wrong place.
out that I sewed them on in the wrong place.
Because that's exactly the kind of thing I do. Like regularly. I'm that mom.
Charlotte was sitting at the kitchen table next to me writing a story that she kept hidden with her arm
so I couldn't read it.
I was sewing and listening to the variety(both good + bad) that Pandora was playing when a song came on, it was this song and I'm linking to it even though I'm sure no one else knows this song or probably cares, really.
But I love it and all of the sudden.... So MANY memories.
Me at 16 and 19 and 21 and 24.... and now.
I have so many tiny but vivid snippets of memories and sounds and smells and places tied to this song... to this band and to those years.
So many happy, carefree memories with good friends...
They all flashed through my mind in a matter of seconds, so many thoughts and feelings.
And then I looked back at Charlotte writing and down at the little Brownie vest I was(badly) sewing patches onto and it was a moment, a strange one.
A moment of then and now and how I am the mom now and where did that other person go, anyway?
The old me, the younger me.
Because if I'm honest, I wouldn't trade where I am now or go back to that time permanently for anything... but sometimes I miss that girl and sometimes I feel like I've lost her, some days she feels a life time away from me now.
////////////////
I think in a matter of seconds I smiled, I felt like crying, I felt like dancing and I just wanted to freeze time right then and just enjoy doing exactly what I was doing.
And then Charlotte looked at me, covered her papers again to make sure I couldn't read anything
and I went right back to sewing with my crooked needle while trying not to look at the sink full of dirty dishes.
And the moment left just as quickly and unexpectedly as it came.
so I couldn't read it.
I was sewing and listening to the variety(both good + bad) that Pandora was playing when a song came on, it was this song and I'm linking to it even though I'm sure no one else knows this song or probably cares, really.
But I love it and all of the sudden.... So MANY memories.
Me at 16 and 19 and 21 and 24.... and now.
I have so many tiny but vivid snippets of memories and sounds and smells and places tied to this song... to this band and to those years.
So many happy, carefree memories with good friends...
They all flashed through my mind in a matter of seconds, so many thoughts and feelings.
And then I looked back at Charlotte writing and down at the little Brownie vest I was(badly) sewing patches onto and it was a moment, a strange one.
A moment of then and now and how I am the mom now and where did that other person go, anyway?
The old me, the younger me.
Because if I'm honest, I wouldn't trade where I am now or go back to that time permanently for anything... but sometimes I miss that girl and sometimes I feel like I've lost her, some days she feels a life time away from me now.
////////////////
I think in a matter of seconds I smiled, I felt like crying, I felt like dancing and I just wanted to freeze time right then and just enjoy doing exactly what I was doing.
And then Charlotte looked at me, covered her papers again to make sure I couldn't read anything
and I went right back to sewing with my crooked needle while trying not to look at the sink full of dirty dishes.
And the moment left just as quickly and unexpectedly as it came.
