{life and stuff}

Friday, August 20, 2010

As a self-proclaimed advocate for  keeping it real, I'm going to write this post but actually publish it?
I'm not so sure.
But probably so.
I have been struggling this week.
Sad.
Depressed.
Down.
Frustrated...annoyed...stressed...angry.....lost....misunderstood.
Old.
All of it.



It is quite common for me to want to run away and be alone when I feel this way.
Just get away.
I know it may not be the best way to handle things but it usually works for me.
It allows me to step away, look at things from a distance, have some space, take a deep breath.
And all that jazz.

But in real life that's not always possible;
The much-needed time away.
There are kids and meals and laundry and dogs and schedules and priorities....

I don't think it really matters what is going on, specifically.
And it's nothing major, just usual life stuff.
Sometimes these things just roll off your back, sometimes they don't.
Sometimes you try your best to get over it, shake it off, move on and not let them ruin your day.
Put on a happy face.
Be grateful, appreciate the day.
But sometimes you can't.
Sometimes I can't.
And sometimes?
It really sucks.




All days are not going to be up, there are downs, too.
All posts won't be pretty.
But most will because I can usually find the pretty somewhere, in something.
And when I can't?
Then I don't think I have to act like I can.


This is where I am conflicted about a post like this.
You don't come here to listen to me whine,  is what my head says.
But my heart says that this is real life. My life.
And although I don't want to put all my business out there all the time, sometimes I need to 
share a little of the rough stuff, the not-so-pretty.
And sometimes? I think all of us need to know that everyone feels this way some days.






But today is Friday.
And I'm glad.
I'm looking forward to the weekend.
And to moving on past the crappy stuff.

And maybe I'll finally pick out that kitchen paint.
And go see Eat Pray Love.
And go through some dresser drawers.
And take a deep breath.
And probably want to go back and delete this post...
but I won't.

20 comments:

  1. Aww ((((Amy)))) hugs to you. Sorry you are feeling down, and that life can have a way of reminding us of all the bad things that don't go away and are right there infront of our faces (sometimes) on a daily basis!
    Your photos are so peaceful and calming to look at!! What beautiful scenes to want to run away to! I know we can't always run away to think things through!! I hope you can escape (even for a brief few minutes) to a room or some secluded spot (the restroom?? :)) to take a deep breath and know that things don't always stay the same way. With each day, time passes...a new dawn comes to start fresh anew!
    Hang in there! @}`~}~~~a rose for you, Gloria

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  2. Sorry you're feeling down! :( We all have those days... or weeks... or months... we've all been there and you have every right to put it out there when you're feeling it!

    I've been mood swinging all week - and almost had a meltdown on my way home from work (school) today when I realized my new office has no window and I missed this beautiful day!

    Deep breaths!

    Keep on truckin' (as my Grandmother would say).

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  3. awww...I have those weeks too. It's been really hard for me since having kids at times because you just can't get away and have alone time when it's needed. That's the hardest part, at least for me. It always gets better though..and I hope that through your beautiful photos and choosing a paint color (I want to know what you go with) things will look more up soon. I'm am dying to see Eat,pray, love..that would be awesome! Tomorrow is a new day..new start! hugs...

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  4. i'm glad you posted this. we can ALL relate, although some of would prefer to pretend we can't. i like being able to relate to blogs on creative, inspiring, and the crappy part of life too. i think it helps to open our eyes a little and realize that we're not alone in feeling like some days we'd like to sell our kids (and maybe even husbands) and other days they make our worlds complete. i think that's all part of being human. that the emotional ride we're on. and like with all good rides, it is soooo much better to be on it with friends.

    here's hoping the crap clears and tomorrow you wake up feeling the new day. :)

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  5. Bummer - I hate crappy days. I know you know this, but sometimes it helps to hear it... WE ALL HAVE THEM. We love your honesty and your not so pretty days. (Uh, and how can you still have PRETTY pictures on not so pretty days??? j/k I would expect nothing less!)
    Hang in there - tomorrow is a new day.
    BIG HUGS TO YOU :D

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  6. Okay, and now I just read Heather's comment. How does she do it??? She always leaves the most heartfelt sincere comments. That girl is amazing. Ditto on the... its better to be in it with friends part - even bloggy friends!

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  7. It always takes me awhile to get over the hump so to speak when my kids go back to school. There is so much emotion tied up in a new school year, new milestones, challenges, experiences. . .

    Its hard not to feel a bit emotional!!

    Hang on!

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  8. don't ever delete this post. i enjoy looking back at moments like these in my journals...reflecting on times when i was down, struggling, overwhelmed...and then seeing the triumph when i come out of it. and i always do. so save this post, visit it, find pride in the fact that you can admit when you are less than perfect, and believe that better days will follow.

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  9. Hugs to you. Sometimes life really does suck. I think most people blog and read blogs in order to share a bit of their life...their real life. There's nothing wrong with adding in a bit of the nitty gritty sometimes. It makes blogs more personal and human. All of the sane people out there know that life isn't always shiny.

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  10. Hi sweetie. You know, for a long time I only wrote positive things on my blog (mostly back in the family blog days...) and it was so good, but I also felt like I was going to explode at times.
    We, your faithful readers, know you are real :) And real people have these down times as well that need to be explored, shouted out and make noise. At least that's what I tell myself...
    Hope you feel better soon... gorgeous pictures, as always.

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  11. I'm glad you didn't delete it. We all have those times, but when we are going through them they aren't easy and sometimes they feel lonely. Today when the "check engine" light came on in my car after several days of other stressful events, I couldn't decide whether to laugh or cry, but here I sit eating a bowl of sherbet and reading about other real lives. Thanks for sharing!

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  12. **hugs**

    I hope the weekend treats you well and brings back your spark.

    You aren't alone. Not by a long shot.

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  13. i feel this way a lot.

    and im glad you posted it. i love hearing other people whine. knowing other people have sad, stressful, overwhelming times is what brings us all a little bit closer.

    hope you get to feeling better soon. :)

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  14. Sending online hugs your way. I can so relate to this post. I can have days, weeks and sometimes months when I feel this way. I love the honesty of your words and your beauty of your pictures. Sometimes I wish I could put everything on pause and go off and be somewhere else by myself for a little while. Impossible to do when you have children isn't it?

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  15. i hope today finds you in better spirits, and it if doesn't -- i hope you will embrace your favorite form of self-care. sometimes we need time to ourselves more than others to rebuild and re-energize. your candor is very much appreciated -- and beautifully written.
    *sending care*

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  16. I'm glad you posted this, because sometimes blogs seem so happy all the time and you start to think that something is wrong with you when you don't feel that happy all the time. We all go through those "funks" and it's nice to commiserate with others that understand. (((HUGS))) to you! Your photos again are so beautiful! I hope you feel better soon and you get some alone time, even for a little bit, this weekend!

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  17. Sometimes just getting out there makes it better. I do hope that you're able to get through...I've been struggling myself, lately. Sometimes I post about it, most times I don't. I've always found that when I do, the support I receive is awesome.

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  18. Hi,

    I know we don't know each other, and I've only been reading a short while, but I wanted to say that I have these very same days (sometimes weeks). Sometimes it really is impossible to shake it off. And while I know posting about it can make you cringe (I know I do), it can also do wonderful things for others. For those of us who read "happy posts" all the time and wish we could be as "put-together" or "cheerful" as our fellow bloggers, "real" posts like this remind us (or me at least) that we're not alone, and that being a mom and a wife and a PERSON is hard (especially when trying to do all three at the same time). So thank you. And hang in there and remember "this too shall pass."

    <3

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  19. I have never commented before, but feel led to today. I posted something similar last May around my birthday when I was going through a tough time. I thought I would have bloggers remorse and delete it, but never did. I still have people call me and say "Are you okay? I just read the birthday post!" I feel much better now, but can totally relate to feeling low. I hope you can decompress and feel the weight of life lift from your shoulders!

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  20. Hugs, girl! It's these types of posts that keep a blog real. We ALL have ups and downs and when you write about them it not only makes you feel better, but the rest of us b/c we can relate. And like to be there to lift your spirits.

    Hope your funk is over soon. If not, it's ok to blog about it. :)

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