There's Beauty Here, Too.

This is Post is # 999 for this little blog of mine.
And I'm blogging from a mostly-crashed computer.
Boo.
A lot has happened in the last 2 weeks...
I feel like I have so much and nothing to say all at once.
But it will just have to wait.
I started this post below1 1/2 weeks ago...

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On dying and losing loved ones and explaining death and heaven and why we're so sad....
But happy at the same time and how all this crying can be scary to kids...
This is where I don't feel quite fit to be the parent, to be the "grown up".

I'm not really qualified to answer these questions.
I have too many questions myself.
You know?

All I really know is....

Crying is okay.

Being sad is okay.

Asking questions and not having answers is also okay.

The process of dying is bittersweet.

Being around family so much is tiring and fulfilling.

Watching someone die is hard.

Watching someone you love that has been with the person dying, since they were 13 years old

 and married for 63 years... is also really hard.

Really hard.

Seeing five grown men surround their dad in a hospital bed in the middle of their living 

room is beautifully overwhelming.

That's all for now.

Hopefully I will be back soon....