Looking Back & Moving On

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Looking back? Moving forward? Forgiveness? Closing A Chapter? Just Do it?
I  couldn't think of a good title for this post, I think all of the above would work. Let me explain....

I recently came across an old friend on Facebook (oh, Facebook!) without even looking for her.  When this friend's name came up I instantly felt a pang of guilt, just like I do anytime I think of her. Guilt, sadness, regret, good times, laughs, lots of memories...all of it comes to mind. This friend and I have not spoken in about...13 years maybe. And we live in the same town. The details aren't really important but we had a bit of a falling out, growing apart, needed some space, whatever you want to call it. Over the years I have thought about getting in contact with her but then I just wouldn't do it. I wasn't really sure she wanted to talk to me or not. Could feelings still be hurt after so many years? I wasn't sure. Another friend, who is not in contact with her any longer as well,  has asked me several times over the years if I was ever going to try and contact her. I knew that when the time was right I would know. This was a really good friend, we were even roommates for a couple of years, a best friend. A friend that I had so many good times and laughs with, so many jokes, we totally got each other's sense of humor, that kind of friend. So I sent her a message, with no expectations, and waited. I didn't wait long; within just a day or two she sent me a message back, by the end of the week we were talking on the phone and by the next week we were meeting for a beer.
  I wondered how it would be when we met...awkward? Would we have anything to talk about? Did we need to re-hash the past? Well, I was a little nervous on my way there but it wasn't really too awkward at all and after we did, in fact, re-hash the past, things seemed normal. We cried a little over Miller Lites-but don't worry, we weren't doing the ugly cry in public, I sware. I left feeling really good. I had answers to questions after so many years and I was able to answer questions that needed answered. I felt like a chapter of my life was both filled in and closed at the same time. I felt guilty that it took me so long to get there but was so happy to be there now. Taking a look back and moving on all in one night.



  1. That's a good story with a happy ending. I think we've all had friendships like that, with regrets and the what ifs. See, facebook is good for something (usually for me, it just consumes gobs of time with little purpose).

  2. Thank you for sharing this Amy! I have a similar situation...although it hasn't been 13 years and trust me we need some more time here...but I do wonder if we'll ever re-connect. Right now, I'm happy to say no! But this post is reminding me to stay soft and open! So glad you got some peace!

  3. What a great story...with the happy ending. I'm glad all was left in the past. That's the best way.

  4. I've always wondered how something like that might play out... as I've got a few situations brewing that could turn out similarly. I have a love hate relationship with Facebook because of what it brings up. So many good things can come of it, and some... eh... ;)

  5. Yes, I think this was a happy ending but then there are those friends I would like to dis-connect with :D

    Corrine- I'm with you, Facebook is both a friend as well as an enemy. I have had a few good things come of it though, so not all bad!

  6. wonderful .. love it .. well done you for reaching out xxx
    am new to fb and finding it at times, incredible but it can leave me feeling very insecure and worried too ... xx

  7. I have one of those, too. I hope we can have a happy reunion someday. Good for you two.


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