A Confession :: I'm That Stay-At-Home Mom

Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Hi there.
Good morning and happy Tuesday.
Every time I post on a Tuesday I feel like I should be having Virtual Coffee here and I plan
to again-- I'm thinking the first week in September will be a good time to get it going.
So last week Kim talked about the whole working while your kids are in school thing and I outed 
myself about what I really used to think about that.
I have to say, it's funny how a change in perspective and circumstances makes all the difference, 


So I have been staying at home full time with the kids for about 3 1/2 years now.
Up until that point I as working about 13 hours a week, that was part- time for my position with
our school district.
Before I went to part-time I was working full-time which was about 27 hours a week.
So I have done full-time, (which wasn't nearly a full 40 hours), part-time and at home.

Now my youngest starts kindergarten in one week and both of my kids will be in school.
Hmm...now what?
Well, I will be the stay-at-home mom whose kids are in school.
I have to tell you that when my kids were much younger- maybe around 1, 2, 3-- I wondered just
what the stay-at-home moms did if their kids were in school?
I mean, didn't you just go back to work when your kids were in school, unless of course you
had no financial worries and you never had to work in the first place?
Isn't that how it was supposed to work?
And what in the world did those people do all day?
I might have rolled my eyes, or just mentally rolled my eyes, when they called themselves
stay-at-home moms.

I might have imagined those moms getting their nails and hair done, shopping because they had
nothing else to do and lunching with friends every day.
Like I said, I may have been a little judgey and I might have been wrong.
I have a feeling I won't be doing a whole lot of the above....I still won't have a huge income 
and my other sahm mom friends still have their kids at home or work themselves...so lunch dates?
Probably not a whole lot of those.
I see a lot of time to help out in the kids classrooms and to get involved in our new school and the parent co-op there.
I see myself walking over to sign the kids out so they can come home for lunch.
I see getting my errands and shopping done during the day by myself.
I see myself watching my two nieces one day a week.
I see myself working a lot on shop stuff.
I see myself not having to take off work every time someone is sick and not having to miss
things at school.
I see myself being the one that is responsible for all school things, for all appointments, for all 
volunteering and the one that has to be home to get the kids to and from school every single day.
Eric works long days and commutes to work so he is never home to help out with these things.

So roll your eyes if you must, I won't blame you, but I am the stay-at-home-mom whose kids are
in school. Yep, that's me.

I am looking more forward to this school year than I did when Wyatt started school.
It makes me sad and a little mad that time goes so FAST but I am also excited this time around--
Charlotte is so excited that I can't help but be, too.
And knowing they are right across the street and that I will be able to see them out on the 
playground with binoculars(they think I am kidding, I am not) gives me a lot of comfort.
For some reason the closeness is really giving me a little peace in this big change.

When I stop to think about it I could get completely overwhelmed--
My baby will be in school, I am entering a whole new phase of MY LIFE and I don't know if
I am ready for it....we are starting a new school and I hope(!!!) we made the right decision....
BUT, I am trying to focus on the positives and not stress myself out over all of it.
We are really excited about both of the kids' teachers and the possibilities + plans they have
at our new school sound really cool.
It is exciting.
Parenthood is hard.
Motherhood is hard.
Change is hard.
Letting go is hard.
Trusting is hard.

and just because i love this video so much...
the sign language is amazing.
gives me goosebumps every time.

Have a great day!


  1. Oh Amy...it's three weeks until my nest will be empty. I really can't even think about it without a limp forming in my chest. Thanks for putting this in words!

  2. Honestly, I think its busier when your kids are older. A different kind of busy, yes, but busy and full nonetheless!
    Good luck and enjoy it all :)

  3. Oh I hear you. My hubby can't wait until I start working again (for the health insurance mostly) but I don't think he realizes how much our lives (his life) would change. And I think that as the kids get older life just gets busier too. There are always things popping up at school, sick kids, grocery shopping, cleaning, laundry, meals, projects, field trips, meeting, sports, boys scouts, the list goes on an on. Plus, even if my kids are all in school (not yet) what happens in summer? Do I quit my job to stay home with the kids again since they are not old enoug to be on their own? Crazy.

    I can't imagine going back to work anytime soon, so I think my hubby will just have to wait.

  4. I was pondering this very thought today. My oldest will be in 1st grade, starting tomorrow. My youngest is two and I will still have a few more years before I am faced with this dilemma. My husband has a demanding job which means I take care of doctor appts. sick days, field trips etc. And I want to spend the summers with my kids....working for a paycheck will just have to wait !

  5. So funny, I was just thinking of this. Caleb starts in 2 weeks and then a few years later Stella will. So where does that leave me? I was just thinking it will leave me so much more time to REALLY be involved in my kids school :)But for now I'm going to enjoy it being just me and my girl for the next 4 years!

  6. I agree with you 100%! I plan to be more involoved in their schools and maybe I will have a cleaner house too?! We'll see :)
    Anyway, it's gonna be great!
    I still have one last little one here for a while but I will get to enjoy her(by herself) like I did the other two. Thankfully, the Lord has blessed us with just enough income for me to stay home because there is no place else I would rather be!

  7. i smiled at my screen the whole time i read this.
    i'm so proud of you.
    (is that cheesy and condescending?? i don't mean it that way...)
    i'm just glad we are friends.
    your are my kinda lady.
    you care about the stuff i care about.
    (big fat smile)

  8. I think you are doing the right thing, but I'm a bit old fashioned so what do I know? My Mom stayed home when we were all in school. It was nice that she was home when we got there after school. She came to class parties. She drove us to field trips. She took us to piano lessons and basketball practice right after school. She kept out home nice. She cooked. She was available all the time to her family. I think that is honorable. There is plenty for Mom's to do when their kids are in school. You mentioned many of them in your post. I also think since your husband works so much, it helps to create peace in the home when you are there. Besides, you've got your business now too, and who knows what you'll do next with your photography. I think you are doing exactly the right thing. Your family will be better off for it in my humble opinion! I think women are the anchor of the home.

  9. It is exciting.
    Parenthood is hard.
    Motherhood is hard.
    Change is hard.
    Letting go is hard.
    Trusting is hard.

    Oh my goodness! Isn't that all so true! So hard.
    I used to wonder what the SAHMs did when their kids were in school. I mean, why stay home?? But I get it now. There is a LOT to do to maintain a home where children live. Max will be in school half a day this year. It'll be weird to have him gone everyday. After being home with a small child every day for the past 5 and half years, I'm not sure how I'll adjust to the change. I think it'll be a bit lonely at first.
    I think this growing-up thing is hard on us adults! ;)

  10. i know it's weird. my kids are both in school and have been for a few years and i have no desire to go back to work. i'm perfectly content. and you will be SO surprised at how busy you keep. the day will FLY by and you will be wondering how in the world anyone ever works with kids in school. i pinky promise. excited for you!!!

  11. seriously girl...you've got this.
    it's going to be a great new chapter that has tons of blessing and surprises.
    it's so interesting to watch this from a distance(you know?).
    how you had peace about sending your sweet kiddos to school closer to home...
    and then how you started a totally rad shop...
    and how God is just filling in the empty time gaps with things to keep you busy so that you don't have to dwell on the kids being gone.
    i am excited for you!!!

    and still giggling about envisioning you peeking through curtains with binocs up to your eyeballs scoping out your kids!
    too funny, girlfriend!

  12. I'm really envious.

    But, I'm glad you wrote this. xo

  13. I'm a new follower of yours, and I just dropped in to say that I'm glad my stay-at-home-mom stayed at home even when we were in school. I have 2 younger brothers, and we were so blessed to have a momma who could drop everything and come help us if we needed it. She didn't get a job until my youngest graduated high school, but let me tell you, my mom never stayed at home. We called her the "Professional Volunteer" whether it was at school, church, or in our community. I was blessed by a sahm and I know your kids will be blessed too. :]

  14. I was that mom when ava was in kindy through 3rd, then she homeschooled for 4th and 5th and now back to being "that mom" again and I LOVE IT!
    I can't wait to workout guilt free, do errands, grocery shop, cook, clean all the while they are gone!
    oh and we live a block from school so I will be having lunch with ava or bringing her hot lunch sometimes and my hubby works in the same building so I will have lunch with him daily too!
    let's get working out and check in with each other! xoxo

  15. wow! thanks for an amazing post. its how i'm feeling right now between this post and the guilty post, i am all about you!!


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