15 minutes

sometimes fifteen minutes can make all the difference in my day.
sometimes fifteen minutes isn't nearly enough to even get me through the next hour.
have you ever noticed that?
okay, maybe fifteen minutes isn't quite long enough...maybe thirty minutes is more like it.
some mornings if i get just that little bit of time to myself for a walk or to blog or sit on the front
porch with a cup of tea, i am ready for it....ready to take on the day.

sometimes fifteen hours isn't enough time though.
you know those days?
eric was gone all weekend on a guys thing that has been planned for about a year;
which means one of two things:  either myself or one of the kids will be sick.
it's a given. this time it was me.
i know, i am still whining about this cough but it has officially taken it's toll on me now.
it hasn't let me get a really good night's sleep in about a week and if it doesn't quit i am going to
 have to invest in some depends. sorry for the TMI, but these coughing fits are getting ugly.
i am feeling tired and grouchy and while i am mustering up all the patience i can,
it is not nearly enough. not even close.

i hate feeling like a whiner but even more so i hate that i put it on myself that i have to either

 preface any posts like this with a 

"you know i love my life and kids and i truly realize how great it is, BUT......"

or end the post with such a summary of how i am counting my blessings each and every day.

i do. i am. 

but really? do i have to tell you every time?

you guys get it.

i'm sure the men aren't doing that every time they complain to each other, right? 

why is it that we feel like we have to anyway?

i was watching something on tv a week or so ago that stuck with me.

some doctor was talking about how depleting parenting can be.

it's true. i thought  depleting was such a good word.

and that's kind of how i feel right now.

sometimes you just don't feel like you have any more to give to everything that needs it.

it's depleting.

and i'm not even going to follow that up with an "and rewarding and fantastic..." 

because we already know that and because i just decided i wasn't going to do that in this post.

i am taking a stand--on this post anyway.

lately i have been trying to get back to journaling on a regular basis.

real journaling with a real live pen and notebook as opposed to blogging or typing.

it helps me so much.

any time i am feeling anxious about whatever i might have coming up or whatever is on my mind...

just to get out some thoughts and let them go, it truly makes me feel so much better.

fifteen minutes of random writing that no one else will ever see... you should try it.

who needs therapy, anyway?

{oh wait--that was me but my insurance wouldn't cover it, that's right...} ; )

fifteen minutes of typing is all i needed this time.

yep, much better.

i think i am ready for monday.

hope your week gets off to a great start today. happy monday, y'all!